Dear Nurse Ansalong:
My mom recently told me I cannot see my best friend anymore because she found out I um.. did somthing with a guy in her closet. It was not her fault and My mom won't listen to me. I have tried talking to her, but it does not help. How do I bulid trust with her on this?
-Dusty

Dusty, many of our relationships that we have in our lives are based on trust. We believe that the people that we care about will be there to care about us. When that trust is broken, it can be very hard to fix it. One thing that helps to rebuild trust is time. In the moment that an event occurs, people can be hurt emotionally. Many times, that hurt can run very deep and take a long time to heal. If you Mom was hurt emotionally by whatever you did in the closet, it might take her some time for the "pain" to heal and for her to trust you again. This could take a month or it could take a year. People recover in different ways, and those ways don't follow a set time table. Another way to rebuild trust is heart. You need to show to your Mom that you really do want to be trusted by her. If she doesn't see that you really want to change the problems that you have, she won't believe you when you try to talk to her about the problems. If you show that you honestly want to win back her trust and you give her some time to heal, I think your Mom will begin to trust you and your best friend again.

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