Dear Nurse Ansalong:
I am 23, a closeted lesbian, and I just recently resaw THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW. Just like when I was 16, I have become a devoted fan. The thing is Tim's character has made me question my sexuality. I have become infatuated with Frank-n-Furter. I have also found myself as of late attracted to gay men, especially this one particular transvestite. It has made me begin to question my sexuality, something I thought I had laid to rest in my teens. What could this mean?
-Jannah

Jannah, this could mean that some of those questions that you thought were answered might not be as complete as you thought. Feelings of infatuation can be a very scary thing. They tend to be very strong and come on very quickly without any warning. Emotions like this can confuse anyone, including people who have their lives pretty well thought out.

From what you've mentioned here, it sounds like these feelings have only really begun to surface over a recent time period. Not to discount these feelings, but it doesn't sound like you've had these feelings for a very long time. This could be, as everyone has heard from their parents, a "phase" that you are going through. Whatever happens, it can be very confusing to have the different thoughts racing through your mind at the same time.

While this could be showing you that you might have some bisexual feelings mixed into your emotional make-up, be sure to think through what you are feeling before you make any life-changing decisions. Infatuation tends to be an emotion that comes and goes quickly and if you base your life around it, you could wind up getting hurt. Give your mind a little time to work through what it is that you're feeling. It might be that there is something in the emotional make-up or personality of gay men that you find more attractive than a woman right now. In a couple weeks, your feelings could change back to a prior appearance. Let yourself be free to feel and experience all that these emotions are bringing to you. They could be telling you many different things, but, to find out the whole truth, you'll have to give it some time.



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