Dear Nurse Ansalong:
I am 15 and female. About a year ago I met this really great girl. We hit it off right away and became very best friends. We know everything about each other. She is my only close friend. About four months ago I spent the night at her house. As the night wore on, I began to feel attracted to her sexually. I had never felt like this about a girl before. I knew that we were both straight, but I couln't help it. That night, I told her how I felt. She informed me that she had had similar feelings, too, even prior to that night. So, over the months we sorta became lovers. About a month ago I stayed at her house for the night again. We both sort of just assumed that we'd have sex. She started to make advances and I became so nervous and scared, wondering if I would be damned if I did, so I told her that we might regret it later, even though I'd really wanted to. We haven't talked about it since, and she is becoming extremely distant. We used to talk every day for hours, but now we rarely speak. I love her with all my heart and she is hurtng me very much. I know that she really cares about me, too. How can I save our friendship?
-Magenta

Magenta, it's always very hard to understand our emotions. Sometimes they can be the best thing, while other times they are our worst enemies. Without knowing exactly what your friend is thinking or feeling, she might have felt rejected by you and that you might not feel the same way for her as she does for you. The fact that she's distancing herself from you could be from the hurt feelings that she has. She might not know that she's hurting you like she is, but you might have to just confront her with what your feelings are. If you do this, make sure that you explain everything, especially what happened and how you felt during the second sleep-over. Be very careful to leave nothing out as you talk with her. Make sure that she understands exactly how much you care about her and what her apparent silence is doing to you. It could take an hour or two, but if she cares about you in the same way that you do for her, then I think the truth about your actions and feelings will bring her back to your side.

  • Send in a letter to Nurse Ansalong
  • Read Past Advice Columns
  • Read Advice Disclaimer
  • Cosmo's Factory Main Screen

    All WWW pages and Perl Scripts - Copyright © 1999 Cosmo's Factory All Rights Reserved