Dear Nurse Ansalong:
It just doesn't seem like most people are interested in me romantically. My relationships with the ones that are interested had to end or can't happen for reasons such as distance or stupidity. I'm only 17 and I know I have the rest of my life ahead of me, but I've been waiting so long for such a relationship. People tell me that I don't need a significant other (I'm bi, by the way.) to be happy, but I just don't believe that this is true for me because I'm so depressed (as well as sexually frustrated). I've had a few close friendships that could have evolved into something more, but I'm always rejected. Sometimes it's obvious that the other person feels the same way about me, but they still say no. I really don't think it would ruin the friendship unless there was a bad breakup.
-Leah

Leah, it is never easy to find that certain someone to be your "significant other". I haven't had an actual date in a little over a year, even though there have been men tell me to my face that they really liked me. A big reason why, to me, many people get together is timing. You could meet someone at a party and not think twice about them because you talked with someone earlier in the evening that you thought was attractive. Then, you could run into that person again a week later, and, suddenly, this person that didn't interest you at first is the most beautiful person on the planet. I know that it's really tough to feel like you're alone in the world. When you think you don't have anyone who cares about you, the world becomes a bigger and colder place. You might hate me for saying this, but I'd advice you to bide your time and don't do anything drastic just to get a date. When you do something like that, you run the risk of making the wrong choice because that person is right there while the person that is perfect for you is distracted by someone or something else. Also, don't be afraid to move on if the person that you're interested in doesn't come around. By continually trying to win someone over who isn't interested, you wind up wasting your time banging your head against a brick wall. Give it a little time and I think your timing will get back into synch...


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