Dear Nurse Ansalong:
I really like this kid, and I know you're going to tell me to be myself, but it doesn't seem to be working. I REALLY like this kid, but I don't want to be a phony. And to make it worse, I'm really shy. How do I get him to like me without me being phony??
-Jane

Jane, I wish I could make it easier for everyone to talk to people that they're attracted to. It would be great if there was a way to ask someone for a date without all of the stress involved. But, I'm sorry to say, there isn't. We all get nervous at least once when we're talking to someone that we find attractive. I still have moments when I turn bright red and I can't seem to get a sentence out correctly. The thing is, the more practice you have at it, the less frequent this reaction becomes. And remember that you don't have to start a conversation with, "Hello, would you go out with me?" If you're worried about him thinking you're a phony, then try to have a conversation with him. Don't go into it thinking that you're going to ask him out. If you're feeling really shy, try having a friend join in to the conversation with you. This person could help you if you start to get nervous. Use this time to let him get to know you for the person that you are. And you should never change the way you think or feel because you want to impress a guy. If he doesn't like you for the person that you are, then maybe he isn't the right guy for you. There are many guys out in the world so don't think that this person is the only one for you. If you talk to him and let him see the real you, then I think you'll be okay.

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