"Shock Theater 3000" By Jenny Erdahl

Based on "Shock Treatment" and "Mystery Science Theater 3000"
* Original Screenplay by Jim Sharman and Richard O'Brien
*  Original Songs by Richard O'Brien
* "Mystery Science Theater 3000" created by Joel Hodgson and Best
Brains, Inc.

{OK is my first parody script so be nice. I choose to do things little
differently. Some songs were cut because they didn't work with the
character that was suppose to sing them.  I wrote Torgo's voice in normal
fashion instead of writing it like the way his voice sounds. If anyone has
not heard Torgo's voice, It GoES SomEThiNG LiKe THis. Which I found
is hard to write and harder to read. Also Nuvenna is always sings and
anyone who talks to her has to sing also. Ortega also mutters when he
talks. Please forgive any misspelled words or grammatical errors. I hope
you like the story.}

* Non Mst3k characters that were in movies or shorts that were misted.

Cast Conversion Chart:
Janet Major ----> Gypsy
Brad Majors ----> Mike Nelson
Betty Hapschatt ---> Crow T. Robot
Judge Oliver Wright ----> Tom Servo
Farley Flavors -----> Pearl Forrester
Ralph Hapschatt -----> Dr. Clayton  Forrester
Macy Struthers -----> TV's Frank
Cosmo McKinley ----> Bobo
Nation McKinley----> Brain Guy
Nurse Ansalong -----> Flavia
"Rest Home" Ricky -----> Callipygeas
Bert Schnick ----> Torgo *
Neely ----> Dr. Laurence Erhardt
Emily Weiss---> Nuvenna *
Harry Weiss ----> Joey the Lemur
Oliver Drill and the Bit's ----> Joel Robinson and Bot's (Cambot, Beeper,
and Nanites)
Cheerleaders -----> Mole People
Wardrobe Misters ----> Ortega *
Vance Parker ---> Mitchell *
Kirk ----> Tommy Kirk *
Floor Manger ----> Mr. B. Natural *
Irwin Lapsey ----> John Agar *

***

Narr: Some where in time and space,
      In a castle far from a satellite
     Lived a bad woman.
     Her life was bad. Her friends were bad
     Even the movies she showed were bad
     But she was still not satisfied
     She wanted something else
     The world.
     Trouble was, she monitor the mind of one man
     And three robot's

 (In Public Pearl studio's the door open. Audience comes in full of B -
movie actors shown in past movies. Mike and Gypsy come in also.)

Mike: I don't Gypsy about the Brain Guy beaming us down to Castle
Forrester for live taping of Public Pearl.

Gypsy: Stop being so paranoid. We can't miss Tom and Crow's segment
on the show.  (They take their seats as the show starts)

 >

Dr. Erhardt: You'll find B movies with unknown faces
A slight slur toward ethic races on MST 3000.

Joey: You'll find robots (Jumps around)
Full of pop culture references.

Nuvenna: Bizarreness and intelligence (Dances around)
On MST 3000 (Spins and stops)

Mitchell: You'll find Tom's messy room
On Satellite above the ground (Point down then up)
Mst3k is the talk of the town
And something else la la la. (Snap his fingers as he tries to remember the
words) Oh poopie!

 (Mole people come out and wave there arms about as their voices are
dubbed.)

Mole: You may not agree with their views
But they're more entertaining than the news.
That MST 3000 is great. Yay!
Whatever others may say.

(Dr. Forrester looks up from his lab table)

Dr. F.: You'll get teenagers played by geezers.

TV's Frank: Long monologues that would cause a seizure.

Dr. F.: Shown again

TV's F: Again and again.

Both: And again!

Aud: Mst3k, Mst3k, your something to mention
What other think you say!
Mst3k, Mst3k you have great conventions
You influence today's youth.
And speak the truth.
Your Mystery Science Theater 3K!

Nuvenna: You are the TV show in America

Joey: That is the best.

Nuvenna:  Home those three robots.

Dr. F: Our movies (Shows the movies) are the crappies.

TV's F: So the world will fall into our lap.

Dr. F: (Rub his hands together.) Soon will be the day
(Clenches fist evilly) When they will all pay.

Mole: We put your log on a hat.

Aud: Mst3k, Mst3k, your something to mention
What other think you say!
Mst3k, Mst3k you have great conventions
You influence today youth
And speak the truth
Your Mystery Science Theater 3K!
(Audience rises)

Aud: Mst3k, Mst3k, your something to mention
What other think you say!
Mst3k, Mst3k you have great conventions
Mike and bot's (Mike messes up clap) are in deadly chase
All through time and space
(Show footage from beginning of the Mst3k intro. song)
Your Mystery Science Theater 3K!
(Audience sits)

(Scene shift to Tom and Crow on Robot on the Run set)

Crow (Dressed up like Betty): What the Hel.... Oh! We are on!  And now
for, well what is certainly NOT my favorite part of show, and hope you at
home hate to, our regular stupid discussion with Judge Tom Servo
Wright. Oh boy. (Shakes his head)

Tom (Dressed like Judge Wright but more flashy): Yeeessss.

Crow: Did you like the opening song?

Tom: I suppose.

Crow: Come on! It's easy question. Either you liked it or you didn't. It's
one or other.

Tom: Well Crow. I must consider many things before I can answer.  The
dancing was horrible,

(Scene switches to Dr. Erhardt talking to Mike and Gypsy. Tom can be
heard in background.)

Dr. Erhardt: Hey Gypsy, remember me?

Tom: The song did have nice beat.

Dr. Erhardt: Come for the Machine Maze?

Tom: I could dance to it.

Dr. Erhardt: I'm exhausted from trying to get back on Public Pearl.

Tom: It did mention me.

Dr. Erhardt: Pearley Forrester is new mad scientist. Whoo!

Tom: But it could of mention me more.

Dr. Erhardt: I tell you Gypsy, That woman is my chance to getting back
on the show.

(Scene changes back to Tom and Crow. Tom is still talking and Crow is
asleep.)

Tom: So I didn't like it.

Crow: (Wakes up) Thank you Judge Servo, for nothing. (Camera goes to
Crow) And now for commercial sign.

(Commercial, TV's Frank is around the Space Children that Pearl picked
up)

TV's F:  (Taps stick on blackboard) Okay kids, let's hear the four F's for
today. F for. . .

Kids: Forrester!

TV's F: F for. . .

Kids: Future!

TV's F: F for. . .

Kids: Fowl!

TV's F: And F for. . .

Kids: Film!

(The kid's gangs up and attack Frank)

TV's F: Ahhhhh!

MaleAnncr: First and foremost, Pearley Forrester's foul films will make
fortify families faint and fall into her control over the fabulous future.
(Tom and Crow go over to Tommy Kirk's Coffee & Oil stand.)

Mr. B: (Over PA system.) Please stand by for Machine Maze, strike the
set of Robot on the Run.

Crow: Thank you so much for stinking up the place Judge Wrong.

Tom: Judge Wright, Oh come on Crow. It wasn't that bad.

Crow: Tom you're so thick. Time for a coffee break before I mop the floor
with you?

Tom: You and what army pin beak?

Crow: Hey, any time and at any place red boy.

(They start to scuffle. Dr. Erhardt breaks up the fight so he can be in next
scene.)

Dr. Erhardt: Hi guys.

Tom: Dr. Erhardt?

Dr. Erhardt: You keep up that low standard of interview and you'll be
kicked off Public Pearl.

Tom: Will we still get a tote bag?

Dr. Erhardt: Everyone gets a tote bag.

Kirk: Hi guys. The usual WD-40?

Crow: Make it a double.

Kirk: (Prepare drink and sets it down) Hi Mitchell. Are you going to be
watching the Machine Maze?

Mitch: Yup. This could be Torgo's finest hour

Mr. B: (Grabs WD- 40 by mistake) Yuck!

Kirk: Yuck?

Mitch: Yuck, Yeah.  This could be a major step forward for him.

Mr. B: Yeah, If he moves fast enough.  I had better go bring out the spirit
of music in Torgo.

Mitch: Whatever.

Crow: Hey, where is my drink?

(Scene shifts to Ortega and Makeup Lady getting Torgo ready.
Announcer voice starts and two rush Torgo on stage trying to get Torgo
to move faster.)

MaleAnncr:  And here to fix your wagons and tell you instructions that
are not in Japanese, is  the miracle mechanic, Machine Maze host, Torgo
Schnick!

Mr. B: Knew his father, I did.

(Torgo stumbles out as audience cheers)

Torgo: Hi-Keeba everyone!

Aud: Hi- Keeba Torgo!

 (Audience cheers some more as make his way to the stage.)

Torgo: Thank you. I want to tell you about a new show "The Film
Factory."  We have  in  studio tonight the host  of this show and his  co-
host.  Please welcome Dr. Forrester and the incorrigible TV's Frank.

(Gypsy and Mike look to each other in panic and look back.)

  Mike: Dr. F!

Gypsy: Oh poopie!

Dr. F: Thank you Torgo.  We have show tonight that will be a real take
over.

Torgo: Good, The master will be pleased.

(Camera to Kirk's Coffee Corner)

Crow: Dr. Forrester and TV's Frank. There are a couple of dickweed's.
Still, the madder the scientist the dumber the assistant.

Tom: Hey, there is Mike and Gypsy.  They must come to see us on the
show. I wonder what they thought of my performance.

Crow: Probably the same of everyone, that it stunk.

(Camera back to Torgo)

Torgo:  Now, for our first contentions. He is a guy who can't repair
robots and she a gal who is totally tubular. You!

(Torgo waves hand toward audience. Camera focus on Mike and Gypsy
who are trying to sneak out)

Gypsy: That's us!

Torgo: Come on. The master does not like to be kept waiting.

Mike: I knew we would be caught Gypsy.

Gypsy:  We might well go down there and get this over with.

(Mike and Gypsy are pull down and lead to stage.)

Torgo: Smiles everybody, smiles. Introduce yourselves.

Gypsy: I'm Gypsy and this is Mike Nelson.

Torgo: Or better know as Mike destroyer of worlds. Right, Gypsy?

Gypsy: Uh, uh yes, uh he has blown up a few.

Torgo: A few?  Let's face it, Mike is dumb as bag of hammers.

Mike: Hey...

Gypsy: Well, I wouldn't say....

Torgo: Look's like a refresher course for this stupid man hey?

(Audience cheers)

Torgo: Tell me Gypsy, do you watch Forrestervale?

Gypsy: No, I mean yes, maybe, uh what was the question?

Torgo: Yes, Public Pearls most popular instructional repair series,
featuring Brain Guy and Bobo McKinley, up grader's experts. I
recommend that you send Mike to them for treatment.

Gypsy: Well, Mike may be no bot builder but uh, up graders?  That
sounds drastic.

Torgo: There is no use trying to ignore the situation.  I'm afraid that there
is only one solution, isn't their folks?

Aud: Forrestervale!

Torgo: Hi - Keeba! Don't go away, the master wants you to stay.

Mr. B: Great job Torgo!

Torgo: Congratulations, you made wise decision.

Mike: Gypsy, I'm not going.

Gypsy: Come on. It might give us chance to escape from Pearl once and
for all.

Mike: I don't need treatment that's given by Bobo and the Brain guy.
(Mike knocks over small machine.) Oops.

Torgo: But you do need glasses stupid. (Torgo & Mr. B  laugh.)

Gypsy: Oh I'm sick doing all the repairs on the ship. Torgo's right, you
are going.

 > (In this song items are shown that  Mike has wrecked and how they
were wrecked as they are shown.)

MaleAnncr: Let's see what items Mike has wrecked.

Mike: Oh, it's that blender (Show blender blowing up.)
Too bad I couldn't mend her
Oh, that's the toaster (Toaster caches on fire)
That burned up on me
And the Refrigerator (Show cow fridge) that bot's tip over later.
Oh pitchin the fixings that I couldn't repair to save my life.

Then there was that  knife draw (Goes flying out)
That went flying out the door
And that trash can (see the can crushed)
That was crushed by me
And percolator that died little bit later.
Oh pitchin the fixings that I couldn't repair to save my life

Gypsy: I remember spending all day
Patching up Crow
When Tom fried him with a death ray
Micro digital awaker, Why I'm never there sooner than later
Oh pitchin the fixings that Mike couldn't repair to save his life.

Ship shield curtain (See Gypsy fix it)
That I fix and should stay certain
He wanted use duct tape (See Mike getting tape)
But I wouldn't let him you see
Oh pitchin the fixings that Mike couldn't repair to save his life.

(Callipygeas rolls in wheel chair. )

MaleAnncr: And now back to Machine Maze. And for those you who
MST3k watches here's our surprise guest. Yes. Here is Torgo.

Torgo: Hey folk it's Callipygeas from Roman times.

Callip: Greetings Torgo. I've come to fetch Mike.

(Mike is put into chair and wheeled out by Callipygeas  and Gypsy
follows.)

Torgo: Well, the subject is off to be committed. (Music stop and cameras
turn off. Torgo just stands there.) Hey, Are we done with this scene?

(Camera goes to Forrestervale office)

ShoAnncr: Forrestervale, The Arrival. Introducing Mike Nelson and
Gypsy.

(Bobo and Brain Guy are in the Forrestervale office as Mike is wheeled
in.)

Bobo: Ah, Mike and Gypsy, how nice to see you. I'm Professor Bobo
McKinley. And this is my colleague and assistant Brain Guy.

Brain G: I'm not your assistant. You are my assistant. Pearl said so in the
note.

Bobo: Poppycock.

Mike: Now listen. There is nothing wrong with me. I don't know exactly
everything about robot repair. I accidentally (Callipygeas inject Mike)
blew up planet and, and, (Mike starts to get woozy) and I didn't steal no
bike neither. (Mike passes out on table)

Gypsy: Mike!

Bobo: Oh my sandwich!

Gypsy: What about Mike?

Bobo: Oh it's okay. He did not swish my sandwich. He barely missed it
though. (Picks up sandwich.)

Brain G: Don't worry. If anyone can help Mike it's us.

(Nurse Flavia comes in)

Bobo:  Ah, Nurse Flavia, when is lunch?

Flavia: You just ate 5 minute ago. You have big appetite for a monkey.
(They put Mike in wheel chair unconscious.)

Brain G: Attend to Gypsy.

Bobo: Oh, we need you to sign this waver. I mean contract.

Gypsy: I can't. I do not have any arms.

Brain G: Oh of course. We will work something out. (Mike, Gypsy,
Callipygeas and Flavia leave the room.)

Flavia: (whispers) Sign the contract later.

(Bobo hit his face on the door on way out office chasing Gypsy.)

Bobo: Ouch! You can sign with you mouth.

Gypsy: Can I take care this later?

Brian G: Of course. (Brain Guy hits Bobo.)

Gypsy: Why did you tell me not to sign the contracts?

Flavia: I just wanted to get in some  more lines in that last scene.

(Camera goes to Torgo is at Machine Maze set with Nuvenna and Joey
the Lemur.)

MaleAnncr: Here's Torgo with a visitor's connection in the 30-second
quiz.

Torgo: As visitor to the SOL, this should be easy.

Nuvenna: About Mike IQ?

Torgo: Your last clue is.... Constant stupidity. You have 30 seconds.

Joey: I once took a whiz on Johnny Carson's sport coat.

Nuvenna: He is pretty thick headed.

Joey: I don't panel very well. Okay, on with the show.

Nuvenna: He dumped me for those robots.

Torgo: Which leads us to...

MaleAnncr: Today surprise prize is delirious stay in the "Design for
Dreaming" fabulous kitchen.

Nuvenna: And he does not even know how to fix them.

Torgo: You got it!

Nuvenna: I got it! I got it!

Joey: (Jump around) She got it!

Nuvenna: I got it! Got what?

Torgo: Congratulation and it's new kitchen just like one from your short.

(Scene switch to Torgo, Brain Guy, Bobo in Forrestervale conference
room. They are watching an instant replay of Machine Maze. On TV
Nuvenna is singing "I got it.")

Torgo: She got it. She got it going on.

Bobo: I can't wait to begin on him. What I'm supposes to do again?

Torgo: I'm glad Pearley Forrester is in charge.

Bobo: You mean the lawgiver.

Torgo: Whatever. She has bought you over.

Bobo: Bought over?

Brain G: Yes you idiot. You where there when happened.

Torgo: You endorse the Film Factory and she will give you enough to eat.

Bobo: How dare she take advantage of my weakness.

Brain G: Trust me. You got the better part of deal way you eat.

(Torgo and Brain Guy start laughing.  Scene switches to Technology
Ward. Flavia has just left. Mike is in cage strapped in the wheel chair.
Gypsy walks around the cage.)

  >

Gypsy: If only you could fix us some arms
I could get out today
You could sleep on earth tonight
And stop your bad movie crying



Then we would be free and on our way

We all could do thing we want to do
You, me, Crow, and Tom
No more movies with Arch Hall
La la hummm something
Oh let's finish this song

(Gypsy goes to tell off Nuvenna in the kitchen. Joey jumping around
saying "She got it." Nuvenna is dancing around.)

Nuvenna: Oh, what do you want?

Gypsy: It's Mike. He has been committed no thanks to you.

Nuvenna: I know, I know. He going to need all the help he can get. He is
as thick as a rock.

Gypsy: Well least he does not need everything sung to him like some
people.

Nuvenna: (Stop dancing) I think it's time for you to go.

Gypsy (Starts to leave): I do not know why I even bother.

(Scene switches to Forrestervale conference room. Flavia is trying to
wheel a cart of food away from Bobo. At table sits Torgo, Brain Guy and
Bobo.)

Torgo: What a meal. It was great. I mean what I could get away from
Bobo.

Brain G: Thank Goodness I do not have a body and do not need food.

Bobo: With Pearley Forrester at the helm, we will al have enough to eat.
By way, when the next meal?

Torgo: Pearley is definitely loosing out by supplying the food for just
you.

(Scene switches to Deep 13 lab where Tom and Crow have finish fighting
and are resting.)

Tom: Well, I'm ready for next show how about you?

Crow: Sure. How about we get Gypsy and Mike for our show?

Tom: Daaaaa. Okay.

Crow: Say, where are they?

Tom: I don't know. They were called up for some game show.

Crow: Oh, Well. Let's at least get out these clothes.

Tom: Hey, I like my outfit.

Crow: You would.

(Scene shifts back to Forrestervale conference room.)

Torgo: Do think Pearl will like the next episode? (He hands a folder with
Mst3k log on it to Brain Guy.) So that Gypsy may be free to help promote
the Film Factory.

Bobo: Hey, were the experts.

Torgo: Who trust eh eh experts?

Brain G: Why Gypsy?

Torgo: Everyone loves the girl robot next door.  Particularly the ratings.

Brain G: So it seems.

(Torgo and Brain Guy laugh. Bobo looks puzzled. Scene shift to Deep 13
lab. There is a knock at vault door.)

Crow: It's open.

Dr. F: Oh yes. I forgot my key and...

Tom: (Looks surprised) Dr. F!

Crow: What do you want?

Dr. F: Just to give you this Crow. (Hand him sealed envelope.)

Crow: (Looks at it) My arms don't work.

Dr. F: Here. I will open it.

TV's F: (open the door) Hey Clay, I found your key.

Tom: The door was open.

Dr. F: Yes, Thank you Frank. You can go.

Crow: Yay, get out here.

Dr. F: Here you go. Now I must get ready for (starts to laugh) tomorrow.

Tom: Whatever. Bye.

Dr. F: Make sure close the door on your way out. Bye.

TV's F:  See Ya. (Dr. F and TV's Frank leave the vault door open. Crow
goes over to call to Dr. F.)

Crow: Oh, Dr. Forrester.

Dr. F: Yes.

Crow: Bite me!

(Dr. Forrester becomes upset but Frank holds him back.)

Crow: That felt good. So, what dose this say? (Reads the letter) That
Robot on the Run has been...

Tom: Canceled!

Crow: Don't ever step on my lines!

(Scene changes to Forrestervale.  Bobo and Brain Guy chime "Gypsy"
simultaneously as she enters the room.)

Gypsy: Ummm, I would like see Mike, Please.

Brain G: That is out question. He is out like a light.

Bobo: It's you we have been concerned about.  Say, do you have any
food with you?

Brain G: (Pushes Bobo out way.) Yes Gypsy. How has life been treating
you? Are you OK?

Gypsy: Well I'm OK.
Bobo: There are tons of people in crazy upside down world who believe
there OK when in really they are hungry. Are you sure you don't have
any food?

Brain G: Ignore him. See these people only think there OK.

Gypsy: If you start quoting out of self help books I'm leaving.

Torgo: (Who is over by view scene and turn's it on.) Just watch this.

Pearl (On view screen): Hello Gypsy. This is Pearl here with nice musical
number about me. It's sassy, brassy, and real musical humdinger. Hit it
boys.

  >

Pearl: Why don't people stop what there doing
To pay attention to me?
It seam like yesterday
When I looked for movie with Pauley Shore.

It's part of my evilness
To send the worst flicks to you
So maybe one day
They'll worship me for sure.

Chor: You're not just looking at woman who can sing
And hunted you through space
And wants just about everything.

(Flavia looks amazed of view scene, because she from Roman times.)

Pearl: I'm not an average loon
Who wants to cause doom.
I'm going to take over the entire human race.


Chor: You're not just looking at woman who can sing
And hunted you through space.
And wants just about everything.

Pearl: You're looking at my beautiful Face.

I viewed "Quest for Delta Knights"
To get my plan in flight
You see the next day
That the spotlight is for me.

It's about time,
I've been with the loosing kind
I'm going make everyone my slave
I'll be on every front page you just wait and see.


Chor: You're not just looking at woman who can sing
And hunted you through space
And wants just about everything.

Pearl: You're looking at my beautiful face!

Chor: You're looking at her beautiful face!

Pearl: You're looking at my beautiful face!

Brain G: Well that was really under played by Pearl. Don't you think?

Pearl: I'm not letting you out my sight, Gypsy.
Security is tight, Gypsy.
So, stay the night, Gypsy.

(View screen is turn off.)

Gypsy: That was worst that my worst nightmare. (Shivers) I want see
Mike.

Brain G: You need think out side the satellite. On to doing bigger and
independent roles.

Gypsy: What are you talking about?

Bobo: You should think about leaving the SOL.

Gypsy: Leave, but the guys need me!

Bobo: They have survived every bad movie they have seen, while you
couldn't see one.

Gypsy: Well...um, But I have run the ship.

Bobo: That is why we are training Mike to become more mechanically
incline.

Brain G: So you don't have to.

Gypsy: Is because I'm not as popular as the guys are?

Torgo: On contrary. Your ratings soar! That why you should leave while
you're so popular.

Brain G: You need to let those guys fend for them selves so they can
become as independent as you.

Gypsy: Well, I do not know.

(Scene switches to Technology Ward. Flavia is just leaving and
Callipygeas is locking the cage. Mike is strapped there forced to watch
machine repair shows. Scene switch to Tom and Crow in Deep 13 lab
throwing all their Robot on the Run stuff and throwing it away.)

Crow: Well, I don't need this or this or this. We don't need any this stuff.
Boy, what was I thinking when I got this?

Tom: Yay, what?

Crow: Should we throw this away or put it in storage?

Tom: Hell, I don't know.

Crow: You know let the Mad's take care all this. I want get Gypsy and
Mike and leave.

Tom: I'm with you. Let's ditch this one horse town.

(Scene switches to Forrestervale conference room.)

Torgo: OK that's a wrap. I'm pooped. I'm heading for bed. Good night.
(Starts to leave.)

Gypsy: Could I see the guys before I go back to SOL?

Torgo (Not even up yet.): The SOL?

Gypsy: The SOL.

Brain G: This is the nerves system of operation, like a brain. We must
keep everyone together so every neurotransmitter can work. So we can
observe the circular rotation of this planet to coming of next day.

Bobo: What are you talking about?

Torgo: (Finally up) Yes, what?

(Flavia and Callipygeas come in.)

Brian G: Are the sleeping quarters ready?

Flavia: Yes, I cannot believe I have to do all this work. I am empresses
and...

Bobo: Then be a dear and lock up.

Flavia: Fine.

(Exit Flavia and Callipygeas. Scene switches to the fire escape where
Crow and Tom are.)

Tom: Let's face it.  We are lost.

Crow: We are not lost. I know exactly where we are.

Tom: Well, I'm going my own way. For it's my way or highway.

Crow: Oh I love "Road House." As matter of fact (Crows pulls out a
book) I have the "Road House Fan Guide."

Tom: Dear God!

Crow: Chapter One: Be nice until it's time not to be nice.
Chapter Two: You're my new Saturday night thing baby.

(Tom immediately goes to sleep. Crow reads on. Scene changes and goes
past everyone's window and the prepare to go to bed. First room is Bobo
and the Brain Guys.)

  >
Brain G: You got matted hair
And you been God knows where
You're disgusting.

Bobo: I'm disgusting?

Brain G: You crap in your hands
And throw at a man
You're disgusting

Bobo: (In bed trying peeling a banana.) I'm disgusting?

Brain G: You're a joke

Bobo: (Get in bed) I'm a joke?

Brain G: I feel like choking
Just stay on your side, okay.

Bobo: Fine, okay. (Starts grooming himself.)

Brain G: You just involving

Bobo: Oh shut up Brain.

Brain G: You make me what hack
And driving me insane.

(Torgo is trying to get to his bed, because he is so slow. Get it? Camera
goes to Gypsy room.)

Gypsy: Right now
I want to sleep
No more putting up with pest
No more horrible creeps
No Nuvenna the space bimbo
Or the annoying brainy albino

(On to Flavia and Callipygeas room. Callipygeas is carving statue of
Flavia and whole room has Roman furniture.)

Flavia: (Get into bed) Good night.

Callipy: (Put down caving tools and they kiss) Good night

Flavia: Not tonight
I have headache and been on my feet.
All I want to do is go to sleep.

(Callipygeas looks disappointed but blows out a candle. Camera pans
back to Crow, who is still reading and Tom, who is asleep.)

Crow: Then Patrick Swayze comes in and says, "Hurt's don't it."

(Mitchell shines the light up on Crow)

Mitch: Say, did I hear you say you have donuts?

Crow: (screams) No!
(Scene shift to Torgo's room who has finally got to bed. His alarm clock
goes off and he turns it off.)

Torgo: Why don't I ever get enough sleep?

(Torgo heads for bathroom where Gypsy in shower. It's reminiscent of
Torgo's peeping scene in "Manos." Brain Guy steps in just in time.)

Brain G: I think you are confused Torgo. This is not the filming for
"Manos 2."

(Scene shift to technology ward. Mike is still tied up and trying in vain to
get free. He screaming "Adatica! Adatica!" Scenes shift to ape planet or
Deep Ape. Bobo is wearing his purple coat. There are props and
costumes used from pasted MST 3k episodes. Gypsy looks around.)

Gypsy: Good morning. I want to see Mike please.

Bobo: (Step in fronts her with mirror. He almost breaks the mirror.) Look
at your self. You are absolutely fabulous. With more matted fur you
could be the most desirable creature that ever walked.

Gypsy: Thanks, but I like the way I look.

Bobo: But, umm.. You need to update your look. Pearl has given you that
chance. You can use this show to open new horizons.

Gypsy: Really?

Bobo: Everyone needs you as a role model.

Gypsy: A role model. Me?

Bobo Yup.

Gypsy: But why do I have to change the way I look?

 >

Bobo: Even the oldest toy
Has been changed to bring more joy.
So the freshness will keep
And make it more neat
And that's new technological interface.

Well first will fix your lip, lip, lip
Just a little bit, bit, bit,
You'll be hip, hip, hip
Everyone else look like a dip, dip, dip
We'll add some RAM chips, chips, chips
So you can keep up with the fast pace
They'll absolutely flip, flip, flip
When they see your new technological interface.

Brain G: Hi - Keeba!

Torgo: It's the look that everybody is wearing
It's absolutely new
It's positively darling
And really super neat
It's the technological interface.

Bobo: Ta dada!

(Gypsy comes in looking the same expect she has red lips and on Janet's
black dress. Brain Guy and Torgo are blow away in amazement.)

Gyp: Well first they fixed my lip, lip, lip
Just a little bit, bit, bit
I'm now hip, hip, hip
Everyone else looks like a dip, dip, dip
Add some RAM chips, chips, chips
So I can keep up with the fast pace
They'll absolutely flip, flip, flip
When they see my new technological interface.

It's not criminal to change something so minimal
Technological interface

Brain G: Let's face the facts there nothing she lacks.

Bobo: Let's face the facts there nothing she lacks.

Bobo & Brain: Let's face the facts there nothing she lacks.

Gypsy: It's not criminal to change something so minimal
Technological interface!

(Scene shift to Public Pearl studio floor.)

Mr. B: Good morning every one. Rise and shine. Would any of you like
to be a happy king?

(Audience cheers as Gypsy, Brain Guy, Bobo and Torgo come down the
stairs.)

Dr. Erhardt: Oh Gypsy, I can't tell you how excited I'm for me, I mean for
you. TV's Frank is even
going to introduce you.

Gypsy: I don't need no stinking introduction.

(Camera to Tom and Crow. Tom wakes up. Camera then goes to TV's
Frank)

TV's Frank: The spectacular, the purple, and a good friend, Gypsy.

(Scene shift to Crow and Tom.)

Crow: Hey, I found Gypsy. (Tom looks at Crow and shakes his head.
Camera focuses on Gypsy.)

   >

(Mole people just move about.)

Gypsy: There a big frontier out there called life
I an't nobodies daughter
I an't nobodies wife
I'm going stake my own piece of land
And you going want know who I'm.
I'm Gypsy, Gypsy

I'm not you or you or you
I'm Gypsy and Gypsy in Me.
Meeee!

(Scene shift to TV's Frank)
TV's F: You can see Gypsy tonight on the "Film Factory," brought to
you by Pearly Forrester.

(Camera moves to Tom and Crow trying to get down and towards to
Gypsy. Brain Guy and Bobo, push them out way to congratulate Gypsy.)

Brain G: Well, Gypsy that was certainly interesting.

Bobo: Let's face it. You were rocking.

Gypsy: Well I...

Crow: Hey, Gypsy.

Gypsy: Say, guys did you catch my act? How do like my new look?
Major change hu?

Crow: You do not look that different.

(Brain Guy and Bobo push them out way and lead Gypsy away from
them)

Gypsy: Well, It looks as if I got go. See ya later.

(Gypsy, Brain Guy, and Bobo start go to their next scene. Torgo has just
gotten down the stairs. Scene switches to Tommy Kirk Coffee Corner.
Joey the Lemur and Nuvenna are in line.)

Kirk: Geesh, that was really far out. Don't you think?

Nuvenna: I suppose.

Kirk: Yeah, she was Grooovvy.

Joey: I eat 4 times my own body in nuts and berries.

Kirk: Say, do think my shorts are short enough?

Nuv& Joey (simultaneously): Yes!

Crow: WD- 40 Tommy, I'm dying for it.

Tommy: (Shakes his head) Sorry, but you are off Public Pearl.

(Crow and Tom walk over to Deep 13 lab)

Crow: Man, this place used to be fun. What happened? Gypsy off in own
show. Mike is God knows where and where are we?

(They look around and realize there exactly where they have started.)

Tom: Completely lost.

(Scene shift to Technology Ward. Even though Mike is gagged, you can
hear his muffled words. His word marked off by  the brackets. Torgo is
already there.)

Gypsy: Hello you lucky people, I'm here.

Mike: [Gypsy?]

Nuvenna: Gypsy, You look different.

Gypsy: Oh I just was updated. Something you should think of.

Joey: L is for lemur. Enough said.

Gypsy: Yup, it's new and improve me.

Mike: [She just wearing a new dress.]

Nuvenna: I don't need improving. I'm a classic and fine just the way I'm.

Gypsy: Yes, classically out date.

(Bobo, Brain Guy, Flavia and Callipygeas come in.)

Nuvenna: Are you the updating doctor?

Bobo: Actually, I'm a professor.

Nuvenna: Tell her I do not need improving.

Bobo: Well....

Joey: I'm often mistaken in for a monkey it goes with the turf.

Nuvenna: Well, I didn't come here to be insulted.

Gypsy: Where do you usually go?

Torgo: Good one Gypsy.

Gypsy: Thanks.

Nuvenna (Getting upset): I don't need this. I came so Mike could be
committed in your care. (Gypsy is to busy  talking to Torgo to hear what
is going on.)

Bobo: That's what happen.

Brain G: We are now trying to break him and you did your part. Very well,
might I add.

Nuvenna: No, no! I though you were going show him bad movie or
something.

Brain G: We showed him bad movies, all them.

Nuvenna: And none worked?

Brain G: No.

Nuvenna: Then find some more horrible ones.

Brain G: We did.

Bobo: We know are jobs.

Brain G: We know how you fell. You're upset.

Nuvenna: (Yells) I'm not upset.

Brain G: Listen we are all here so Pearl can take over world. Maybe this
song will make you feel better.

   >

Bobo: We showed things I would watch myself
And done for couple of years
They should be calling for nurse
But they're in perfect health.
We tried new gimmicks
Like "Time Chasers"

Brain G: We tried "The Creeping Terror"
And a movie staring Edward Plots
But they survived everyone them in the theater
We'll stop before he escapes off
With those bot's.

Bobo: They'll give those movies ... the Riffing Treatment
With the jokes that they'll fire.
They'll give those movies ... the Riffing Treatment
Look out if your movie is a bore
For they'll take and mist, fy ya.

Flavia: We were in Roman times and unknown of modern science
When burn it down in what just seem yesterday
Now were here in this evil alliance
And things just look grave.

(Callipygeas make stone carving during this verse)

Bobo: They'll give those movies ... the Riffing Treatment
With the jokes that they'll fire.
They'll give those movies ... the Riffing Treatment
Look out if your movie is a bore
For they'll take and mist fy ya! fy ya, fy ya, fy ya!

(Everyone gets up and dances around Mike's cage, even Torgo.)

Crow: Look! Torgo is work with two reconstituted knees. What
dedication.

Tom: Crow!  Mike is lock up in cage and Gypsy has been brain washed.

Crow: Oh ya.

(Everyone dances out Technology Ward. Scene changes to studio floor
where Dr. Forrester welcomes Gypsy to studio floor of "Film Factory."
Large picture of Pearl is carried in.)


Dr. F: Welcome Gypsy to Film Factory rehearsal.

Gypsy: Thanks.

Dr. F: We are all exited about tonight festive.

Gypsy: Is my face going be put on one those big pictures?

Dr. F: Of course. Bigger is always better.

(Gypsy is greeted by fans that are famous robots. Such as R2d2, Data,
etc. They chant "Gypsy, Gypsy!")

Dr. F: Why don't you take Gypsy and help freshen up bit before
rehearsal?

TV's F: Daaaa, okay.

(The crowd gets upset)

Crowd:  Aw no!

(Crowd follows her. Some of the band members also do. Joel approaches
Dr. Forrester)

Joel: Hey, I thought we going do this weeks invention exchange.

Dr. F: Later Jim.

Joel: It's Joel.

(Dr. F goes to talk with Torgo, who just got downstairs. Dr. Erhardt stops
Gypsy just before she goes upstairs.)

Dr. Erhardt: Gypsy, do you have anything to say for our TV audience?

Gypsy: Reboot for today.

(Crowd claps.)

Dr. Erhardt: And that was Gypsy, the newest star around here. (Camera
goes off) Okay lets move out.

(Camera goes to Dr. F and Torgo)

Dr. F: How is Mike?

Torgo: He hasn't begun to break.

Dr.F: That some news Mom will hate. Are the goons using right tools?

Torgo: No, they're just fools.

Dr. F: I wouldn't mind taking crack at patience.

Torgo: I would check with Pearl first.

( Dr. F calls Pearl.)

Pearl: NO!

(Scene change to Gypsy dressing room. Bobo and Brain Guy are at bar.
Brain Guy is making the drinks like in "Devil Fish.")

TV's F: Is there anything else Gypsy?

Gypsy: Yes, either these curtains go or I do.

(TV's Frank takes the curtain)

Brain G: Hey, I made those curtain with my mind.  Besides, we can't
forget who were doing this for.

Gypsy: Who?

Bobo: Pearl.

Gypsy: You know, I'm sick hearing about that mint giving woman. I have
more going for me than she ever will. You know, she is the  reason Dr.
Forrester is so screwed up. She sounds like word that rhymes with bitch.
I don't know why I'm wasting my time with her or you. I should be with
my fellow robots.

(Gypsy gets up and goes out to balcony. At bottom of stair is  the band.
The crowd goes crazy when Gypsy comes out.)

Band: Hi Gypsy!

Beeper: Be be be.

Gypsy: Hi guys. Did see my performance?

Joel: Yes, we did. It was great.

Gypsy: Thanks.

Joel: Why don't come down here and talk to us?

Gypsy: I can't. They said I have stay here.

(Scene shift to dressing room. Brain Guy is putting  a lot RAM chips in
Gypsy's drink. Brain Guy, with the drink, goes out to balcony to get
Gypsy.)

Joel: Who?  The Mad's and Pearl new minions?

(Gypsy nods Yes)

Brain G: Here, have a drink.

(Gypsy drinks the whole thing)

Gypsy:  I'm  woman here me roar.

(Gypsy stumbles)

Brain G: I think you need a time out. You have had busy day.

Joel: Don't worry. We will take care of them.

(Brain Guy and Gypsy walk back into room. Scene shift to TV's  Frank
and Dr. F being interviewed at bottom stair by Dr. Erhardt. )

TV's F: Weren't they great? But getting back to the Film Factory, all in
all, it a way for us to make bad movies by the tons.

Dr. F : And passing the saving on to you.

Dr. Erhardt: Can I be part this evil plan?

(Camera switch to Crow  and Tom)

Crow: Making bad movies? That doesn't sound good.

TV's F: Well, I don't know.  Film Factory is  Pearl's plan so you'll just
have see her.

Dr. Erhardt: I will.

Crow: Did here that Tom?

Tom: Yes Crow. Maybe she'll give us another mint.

Dr. F:  The next step is to get Gypsy to move into her new big part of this
evil plan that starts  all  right here.

Dr. Erhardt: Well, keep me updated please.

(Cameras on Tom and Crow going toward wardrobe room)

Crow: Can we get out these outfits?

Tom: Why?

Crow: Well, I'm chaffing like bear.

Tom: Sure, I wonder if they have any satin tap pants.

Crow: Shut up.

(Scene shift to Technology Ward  with Nuvenna, Joey and Mike. Mike is
still caged up.)

Nuvenna: Oh, what I'm going to wear?

Joey: I'm the clown prince of the primate world, who often mistaken for
our friend the chimpanzee.

Nuvenna: That's nice.

(Mike moans.)

Nuvenna: Oh, be quite. (She shoves his mouth fill pills.)I have to decide.

Joey:  But don't make any mistake; I'm not saying they're anything
wrong about chimpanzee brethren.

(Mike moans and passes out. He begins to hallucinating. He sees Gypsy
walk in the Technology Ward)

Gypsy : Out baby, out. I'm taking over.

(Mike gets a "Huh?" on his face. Scene shifts to dressing room where
Gypsy passed out from too many RAM chips. We see Gypsy
hallucination. Torgo's bedroom door opens.)

Torgo: The master will be pleased.

(Torgo's door close. Brain Guy and Bobo's door open.)

Bobo: I'm  hungry.

Brain G: You disgusting.

(Their door closed. Camera movies to Pearl on TV. )

Pearl: I'm not letting you out my sight, Gypsy.
Security is tight, Gypsy.
So, stay the night, Gypsy.

(Gypsy imagines herself in Mike's chair. Mike walk in.)

Mike: Out baby out. I'm taking over.

(Crowd is heard chanting in background. Brain Guy wakes up Gypsy
who still asleep on couch. )

Brain G: Wake up Gypsy. You have guest. You can come in now.

(The band enters)

Beeper: Be be!

Joel: Gypsy, you don't look so good.

Gypsy: Who are you?

Joel: The band and your friends.

Gypsy: Do have enough RAM chips?

Joel : No

Gypsy: You will soon. What are you called - your band?

Joel: Joel Robinson and the Bot's

(Gypsy passes out with an "Ungh." Scene switches to wardrobe room.
Tom and Crow are looking around.)

Tom: Crow it's important that we get Gypsy  away from Forrester
clutches and bust Mike out his pen before we get lost again.

Crow: Oh this is so exciting. We are having adventure like the "Goonies."

Tom: Put this Deep 13 tag on.

Crow: I can't believe we are back were past experiment were held.

Tom: Experiments. Past experiment. This starting adding up.

Crow: Where should pin this on?

Tom: Where Mad's put there's.

(Scene changes to Forrester castle. Mitchell just entered)

Ortega: (Mutters) Ugah umah uam.

Mitchell: Really? That is interesting.

Ortega: Umgh umga.

Pearl: How do understand what saying?

Mitchell: He sounds just like me when I get drunk.

>
(This song takes place in wardrobe room)

Nuvenna: I'll show stuff with Noa Berry
I'll be bring out the nasty and mean side of me.

Joey: I'm often mistaken for a monkey
But don't make that mistake please.

N&J: Oh  we'll show movies that are stupid
Oh  we'll show movies that are stupid


Bobo:  Stuff like "Gamera Vs Gurrion"

Brain G: That's more boring than Bob Dole

Bobo: It will cause confusion

Bobo& BG: Is the movies that we will show!

Frank: Like  a good assistant I'll help with these pick.

Dr.F: With nobody's with no acting career

Frank: These movie to make them sick

Dr. F: And soon they will all learn to true meaning of fear.

Flavia: Let's face it. These guys are sneaky.

Callip: I'm just glad to speak  some.

Flavia: They're all just plain icky.

Callip: I wonder if they'll let me do some dancing.

All: Oh oh  oh! Hey hey hey!

Bobo&BG: These are worst flicks
Because Pearl is in control
Soon even Magic Voice
Will watch stuff like "Screaming Scull"

All: You may call us all dicks
But it's our job to make you sick.

Oh  we'll show movies that are stupid
Oh  we'll show movies that are stupid

(Scene switch to Gypsy  dressing room)

Gypsy: Where are the guys?

Brain G: Don't worry they are watching. Everyone is watching.

Dr. Erhardt: Listen Clayton, I want a bigger part. If  I don't get another
scene now, right now, their going to be trouble!

Dr.Forrester: Later, okay?

Dr. Erhardt: Clayton!

(Slams the door)

Dr.Forr: How is she? Well come on. Mom's expecting her any minute.
You guys get out there and give it to them in second act, okay? Well
move!

Dr. Erhardt: I just want ask few question. I've got know what happening!

Joel: These are for you Gypsy. (Hands her some RAM chips)

Beeper: Be be be be.

Brian G: Amateurs.

(Brain Guy shoves them down Gypsy's through. Camera to studio where
"Film Factory" set is up. Mole people just move around and hold up a
sign that  has Gypsy's name on it.)

Aud: Gypsy!

(Crow snoops in research room. See glass case with writing on it. He
reads it out loud.)

Crow: In case of plot hole, break glass. (Crow does so and pulls out some
kind of remote.)

(Camera back to Film Factory.)

Dr.F: Ladies and gentlemen, the studio band will be here. And no it's not
Dell Aires. But they are just as good for taping of Pearly Forester Film
Factory!

(Audience cheers. Scene switches to Dr. Erhardt)

Dr. E: And so if your follower of tyrannical want-to-be dictators that
seize power, you'll find plenty  it here.  So to fit in more, I took  over the
camera and made my own segment. Thus giving me a bigger part.

(Crowd claps.)

Dr. F: Now Public Pearl is proud to present the SOL's own - with that
machine music sound, lets hear for  Joel  Robinson and the Bot's!

(Camera back to Crow and the remote. He reads the  label.)

Crow: Plot convinces device. Press button.  (Crow press on buttons and
Tom appears.) Cool, now we can end this story fast. (He presses another
button and they disappear to get Mike. Camera back to Film Factory)

>
Joel: I know how it feels
To watch reel after reel
Of bad movies
It's tough.

But then Gypsy somehow
Got me down
I came back, it's no bluff
It was though a bit ruff.

I left in Hamdinger kit
It was like being in a closet.
And if you ask me
How was it?
Leaving bot's I was creating
It was heart breaking
With out doubt

(Tom and Crow uses the plot convince device to break Mike out.)

But I'm
Esc esc esc esc
Escaping now!

Leaving  was something I didn't choose
It made me blue
Even though what Mad's
Did to me

Don't believe rumor or jive
You see I'm alive
It's hard to believe
But that red jumpsuit still fits me.

I left in Hamdinger kit
It was like being in a closet.
And if you ask me
How was it?
Leaving bot's I was creating
It was heart breaking
With out a doubt

But I'm
Esc esc esc
Escaping now!

Mike: Where we going?

Crow: To end this story.

Joel: Escaping Now!

Aud: Escaping now!

Joel: Escaping now!

Aud: Escaping now!

Joel: Yay!

(Audience cheers. Scene switches to Forrester castle. Conference
between Bobo, Brain Guy, Torgo, Dr. Forrester, TV's Frank, and Pearl.
Dr. Erhardt is there with his  crew)

Pearl: She represents  everything people want: innocence, sweetness,
and happy life. (Crowd applauds) And behind her image, my fowl film
factory will grow without anyone question it, operating on frontiers of
mad science. Huh? Huh? (Everyone complements Pearl) Under my firm
guidance and supervision we will spread red-hot pain from above!
(crowd goes crazy over idea)Now, lets go out there and win!

Dr. Erhardt: Mrs. Forrester. May I have a moment of your time?

Pearl: Sure I guess.

Dr. E: I heard rumors that you going to reveal more than evil factory
tonight. Is it true?

Pearl: Yes. So.

Dr. E: Well could tell more about it?

Pearl: Lets just say for first time these experiment are going to be shown
nation wide.

Dr. E: And how does Gypsy fit into the scheme of things?

Pearl: She the image I'll be using.

Gypsy: Pearl?

(Tom, Mike, and  Crow are lost in Machine Maze.)

Crow: Pearl is planning to take Gypsy popularity as cover for her bad
movie factory.

Mike: How do you know this?

Tom: We used plot convince device to get copy of her plan.

(Back to studio)

Dr.F: Ladies and Gentlemen, SOL's own Gypsy! We bring you Miss Mad
Plan Helper!

(Gypsy enters wearing her gold dress. She walks to her thrown.
Everyone tell her how much they love her.)

Brain G: This stunning outfit that Gypsy is wearing was furnished by my
mind. Note the individual styling and exquisite tailoring that could only
be made by being of higher intellect, as me. This is just one many gift
given to Miss Mad Plan Helper.

(Audience goes wild again.)

Dr.  F: Ladies and Gentlemen, the President.

(Drum rolls as John Agar comes in and up to podium.)

John: Hi! I'm John Agar, President of Agar Autos. I'm hold in my hand
pair key. These keys that might open up past civilization or some way for
us communicate with animals. But they don't. These  keys fit in a car. A
nice little hot rod with radio, tape deck, plush fur and few choice tapes.
And it's all her for absolute free.  I also want say.....

Dr.F: (Grabs the microphone back and pushes John off the podium. Bobo
stops take the keys and escorts John off stage.) Thank you for those
kind words.  Well Gypsy. Gypsy is speechless. But here is someone we
do want to hear from. He has just come from Second Banana Heaven.
That's right, Torgo the white angle!

(Torgo come in his white robe.)

Torgo: Hi- Keeba Everyone.

Aud: Hi- Keeba Torgo.

Torgo: Thank you.

Dr. F: What's new Torgo?

Torgo: I'll tell you what new my child, My knees were fixed. For there are
no bum knees in my world.   But let's here for  and P for..

Aud: Pearley

Torgo: and a F for...

Aud: Forrester!

(Pearl enters. Audience goes wild.)

Pearl: My victims, I mean friends. (Pearl laughs) My friends tonight  we
are taking the first step of  controlling this country, and starting
something that will grow so big that the whole world will fall into my
clutches.  And it will all be covered up by this face.

(Gypsy stands. Audience cheers. Crow presses a button on  the plot
convince device. Mike trips and goes through the wall and come
crashing through giant picture of Gypsy. Audience is startled.)

Mike: Witch!

Pearl: Who are you?

Mike: I'm your latest experiment and victim.

Gypsy: Mike!

Bobo: Arrest that man.  He'll ruin the show. Besides he under our care.

Gypsy: I never signed contract. I don't have any arms.

Tom: Finally, in operative arms come in handy.

Pearl: (Out raged)  She was last one SOL.  I was this close to controlling
her.

Mike: Why concentrate on  her?

Pearl : I wanted to take those robots away for  you sir.

>
Pearl : You're just a looser
A plain old stupid stupid man

Mike: You are an abuser
Filled with anger and hate
You found us in the year 5000 to date
All you want to do to us is  torture
For what ever reason Mrs. Forrester

Pearl: I'll hunt you down any way I can
I swear this on my heart

Mike: Why? I've done nothing wrong

Pearl: I lost my baby and you're the cause
I'll monitor your mind
And you'll lose your grip
So just die die die!

Mike: With you as Mom
I can see why Dr. F is mad
His screwed up because you
Which is so sad

Pearl: Why don't you shut up and die!

Mike: I'm expert on William Sylverster
Survived "Space Mutiny"
I'm still fine and dandy.

Pearl: I'm it and they're no one finer
I'm on my way to becoming great
To rule the world is my fate
I showed "Revenge of the Creature"
As you first bad feature

Mike: I've taken more abuse from you than any other man.

Pearl: I'm only being to start

Mike: I've done nothing wrong

Pearl: I lost my baby and you're the cause
I'll monitor your mind
And you'll lose your grip
So just die die die!

Mike: You took me away from my home
And my family
You have no compassion
You lost it you see

Pearl : Why don't you shut up and die!

(Scene shifts back to film factory set.)

Pearl: (Addressing the audiences)Pay no attention to the man behind the
curtain.

Mike: What are you talking about?

Bobo: Say, is it lunchtime? I'm hungry.

Torgo: The master will not be pleased.

Dr. F: What?

Torgo: Just memories.

Dr. F:(to Pearl quietly) We'll edit the tape, package it and still be able to
sell it. We can always find a couple of  more bad movies to show them.

Pearl: Bad movies, Bad movie! yes, that will work out just fine. Besides,
we still have Gypsy. Right?

(All eyes turn to Gypsy. She helps Mike get out picture. )

Gypsy: I rather have small part on the SOL than have big part in this evil
plan.

(Pearl is shocked and starts chanting "Out." The crowd joins in. Mitchell
comes an escorts Mike, Tom, Crow and Gypsy to Deep 13 lab.)

Pearl: This is only a minor set back, I'm still going to rule the world. With
everyone that's here. (Audience cheers. Pearl bows and motion to Frank)
And to start things off  I'm going announces my new assistant and Miss
Mad Plan Helper. Um,uh,  What is  your name?

Frank: Frank, TV's Frank

Crow: You know you want me baby.

(Camera goes to Nuvenna and Joey)

Nuvenna: I knew she couldn't handle a staring role.

Joey: Randy as jackrabbit, that's me all right!

Brain G: I can't believe she picked someone from the old series.

Bobo: I swallowed the keys to car. (Bobo tries choke them back up.)

Pearl: And remember, if we can't find bad movies will make them.(Pearl
kisses TV's Frank. Dr. F looks real upset but keeps on clapping.
Audience cheers) Now come with me and you'll all be in your own movie.

Aud: Yay, jobs!

Pearl:(To Frank) Sorry, I was just caught up in the moment. Now get out
my way.(To audience) Come on!

Dr. Erhardt: I  can't believe it. Everything good happen to other
assistants.(Audience member are being handed scripts by Bobo and
Brain Guy) The fowl film giant Pearly Forrester has just given Miss Mad
Plan Helper the kiss of approval or death, I don't know.  And crowd is
loving idea being in there own movie, even if they're bad.

Crow: Hey Mitchell, they have beer and food.

(Mitchell leaves and just shoving Mike and  the bot's in Deep 13 lab and
takes off.)

>

Mike: We do it without compassion

Gypsy: It's our passion.

Mike: We do it to be funny.

Gypsy: Not for the money

Tom: We do it to survive our enslavement

Crow: Even though we hate it.

(Crow open the vault door with the plot convinces device.)

Tom: But..

(All them conga out and take there silhouettes seats.)

All 4: We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them
No matter how bad the movie is showing

We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them
We just gotta riffing

Mi&Gyp: We riff them fast or slow

To&Cr: It all depends how it goes

Mi&Gyp: We try to improve it.

To&Cr: Though noting could save it

Mi&Gyp: We do for the enjoyment

To&Cr: Not just for employment

(All 4 come out theater seats to the  stage to see Joel & Bot's waiting for
them in hot rod.)

We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them
No matter how bad the movie is showing

We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them
We just gotta keep riffing!

(Scene shift to Pearl office. Pearl others having champagne. Camera
follows audience who getting ready for their parts. They all singing.)

Aud: Mst3k, Mst3k, you're something to mention
What other think you say!
 Mst3k, Mst3k, you're something to mention
What other think you say!
Mst3k, Mst3k you have great conventions
Mike and the bot's are in deadly chase
All through  time and space
You're Mystery Science Theater 3K!

(Shift to stage where Crow has jump started the car with the plot
convinces device.)

We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them
No matter how bad the movie is showing

We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them anyhow anyhow
We're going to miste them
We just gotta keep riffing
We just gotta keep riffing
We just gotta keep riffing

(Mike, Tom, Crow, Gypsy and the band, all get into car and drive off. The
door closes behind them.)

Narr: It's just a show so relax

We just gotta keep riffing.

The End